It’s FRIDAY. We made it. Football is back, we have actually good games coming out in the next few weeks, and it’s almost sweater weather, which means all us out of shape boys can start covering up our man-titties in hoodies and sweatshirts. Today’s song to get you HYPED up for the weekend: Panini by Lil Nas X. He just dropped this awesome futuristic music video yesterday on YouTube and this song has been stuck in my head ever since. But I have no idea who “Panini” is. Does Lil Nas X want to fuck a panini? Is that the whole point of the song? I don’t really give a fuck because that song slaps.

Anyway, let’s get into this week’s Quick Time Events (QTE’s):

We had a new Nintendo Direct on Wednesday

Nintendo has absolutely killed it this year. You could watch the entire press release above, or ya know, you could just read this brief summary of the highlights. Banjo-Kazooie is now out on Smash, with Terry from Fatal Fury announced as the next DLC character. Overwatch is coming to Switch in October, which I have no idea how that’s gonna go because I don’t think the Switch will be able to handle that big of an online game. Bethesda is re-releasing DOOM 64 for Switch, which is everything we’ve ever wanted (not, not at all). There’s a whole lot of old games being ported to Switch including Asssassin’s Creed 4 and Jedi Knight 2: Jedi Outcast. They announced this new team-based shooter called Rogue Company, which looks like a title generated in an online “name my clan” generator. You can changed your character’s shirt in both Animal Crossing: New Horizons and Pokemon Sword and Shield. But the biggest and most important news is SNES games are now available on Switch, and are free with a Nintendo Online membership. I’ve already started Super Mario World and Link to the Past up and I am 8 years old again in front of my family’s age old Zenith cube TV. If own a Switch and have not played either of those two titles, your next 30 hours are already planned for you. Play them now.

And these guys loved it…too much?

The last half of that clip is their reaction to learning that you can change your player’s shirt in Animal Crossing. Or at least that’s what I hope.

Listen, I’m all about getting excited for video games. During E3 when Keanu Reeves walked out, my jaw hit the fucking floor. And hell, I’ll even admit when they announced the SNES ports during this conference, I let out a big “OH MY GOD”. If you were watching on stream, you know this to be true. But guys…come on. The girl in the front row looks like she’s about to cry, an the guy in the middle is having a seizure. Outside of the SNES news, I cannot imagine what else during that conference could have elicited that reaction.

The “its spookeeeeyy” girl from E3 just quit her job

GhostWire: Tokyo was one of the highlights for me at E3 this year, and definitely Bethesda’s best game they debuted during their conference. Ikumi leaving is a really big deal, since she was not only the creative director for GhostWire: Tokyo, but also The Evil Within series. Two takeaways from this: first, you should immediately downgrade your expectations for GhostWire. There is a slight chance that she stayed with Tango Gameworks long enough to ensure that it will still be successful, but there’s an even bigger chance that she left for a reason. Could be work culture related, could be the corporate didn’t like the path she was taking the game down; either way, she’s a gaming genius and there will be a big hole to replace. Second, keep an eye out for where she goes (or just let me do it for you). Whatever studio she joins/creates will be amazing.

Apparently, Gears 5 is actually good?

I am legitimately stunned. I’m a fan of the franchise, don’t get me wrong. I think that Gears of War 3 was one of the best looking games on Xbox 360 and had the most stable multiplayer servers. I legitimately don’t think I lagged or got kicked from a single Gears 3 match. But Gears 4 sucked, and that’s putting it lightly. The campaign was absolute garbage, and I hated the addition of the robot things. All that being said, I am a Game Pass owner and Gears 5 is free…and I downloaded it last night…so fuck it guess I’m binging through the whole campaign in a week because there is ZERO chance I will touch this game again after Borderlands 3 comes out next Friday. Will probably be streaming it sometime this afternoon when I get off work so stay tuned to my Twitter to see which platform I’ll be on today.

Watchmen series premieres on October 20th on HBO

I have to say I am absolutely fucking terrified for this series. On one hand, you’ve got one of the best graphic novels of all time being brought to TV by the best studio in the world, HBO. But on the other hand, the showrunner is Damon Lindelof, the showrunner of Lost, and director of the films Cowboys & Aliens, Prometheus, Star Trek: Into Darkness, and Tomorrowland. What do all those projects have in common? They didn’t meet expectations and all their endings sucked. But then again, this is HBO, who is behind some of the best TV shows of all time. Also, this is HBO where they let two dumbasses ruin Game of Thrones. I’ll be tuned in and praying my goddamn heart out that this doesn’t get fucked up.

Ok, I figured out what everyone got so hyped about…it’s the Undertale skin for Smash