Wrapping up the big conferences this year was Nintendo with their annual pre-recorded Nintendo Direct. They’ve already announced a ton of games over the last few months, so were there any other takeaways this year at E3? Let’s find out:

Winner: Luigi’s Mansion 3

As I’ve stated with DOOM Eternal, Watch Dogs Legion, and FF7 Remake, this is how you showcase a hyped up title. Yes, Luigi’s Mansion 3 isn’t as big as Super Mario Odyssey, but it’s still in Nintendo’s most popular universe and features its cornerstone characters. And they didn’t disappoint at all! A “Flubber” version of Luigi? I chuckled a bit at the look but it looks fun. And slamming ghosts around like I’m Bam-Bam Rubble looked like a blast. Maybe I’m just a sucker for Mario games, but this seems like a good time and a solid title for Nintendo this year.

Loser: Showcasing ANY JRPG

It’s not their fault, because they actually would have been fine had they gone before Square Enix’s JRPG orgy just 14 hours prior to their conference. But for anyone who watched Square Enix’s conference, there was a collective sigh amongst us all when we saw and JRPG title because, well, we’ve seen enough. Not a huge loss at all, but a shot nonetheless.

WINNER: Link’s Awakening: Cute Edition

Considered by many to be one of the top 5 Legend of Zelda titles of all time, this remake shocked the gaming world when announced in February this year. And after watching the new trailer, you can see why. The art style is so freaking cute and polished. All the iconic characters look great, and as someone who’s never played Link’s Awakening, this is a must play for me this year. I was shocked as well to see that they’ve added a dungeon builder to the title. That’s gonna be freaking awesome. I don’t have the patience or thought power to build my own, but I’d love to see what some of the community creates. And all of this, the whole fucking package, is coming this September. What a huge fucking win for Nintendo, smack dab in the middle of the conference.

Winner?: The Witcher 3 Wild Hunt

I mean, I guess this is a win? Don’t get me wrong, this is one of the best if not the best game of the current generation, but how will the Switch handle it? The game has got to be stripped down a ton in order to run on a significantly less powerful device. How will that translate? Only time will tell I guess. If it does run very well and still look reasonably good, it is a win. It is so damn long of a game that making it portable for players that have long commutes in cities that have bus or subways systems is huge for Switch owners. I hate long commutes myself because I drive to and from work, but if I could hunt some beasts prior to work every day, I think I might hate my life just a little less.

Winner: No More Heroes 3

With a mediocre spin-off just releasedin January ago, I was fully expecting this to be a DLC announcement like Bayonetta or someone would be playable in the new game. But a whole new game coming next year? Ugh…yesssss. For those unfamiliar with the franchise, imagine if Deadpool was created by a Japanese company for a hack and slash game. That’s No More Heroes, starring Travis Touchdown. Hell he won his signature “lightsaber” weapon at a fair! Its hilarious, its raunchy, its full of pop culture references; its just a hoot and a half (how do you get a half hoot? Choke an owl? I’m gonna test that one day…). Huge surprise and huge win.

Winner: Panzer Dragoon Remake

Disclaimer: I do not actually care about this game whatsoever. I thought it looked very boring. I’m really not interested in a rail shooter where you play as a “dragoon” shooting purple balls out of it’s…horn? But Twitter exploded from all the fans who loved this announcement so bravo Nintendo. I’ll still pass.

Winner: Astral Chain

Very cool game. Looks like someone took the Resident Evil police and mashed them up with a Devil May Cry game. And it’s made by the same developer behind hack and slash series Bayonetta and the highly touted Nier: Automata. It has every reason to be a wildly successful Switch exclusive. I am a bit bummed that its a full price $60 title, but I guess it’ll be worth it if the game is at least 10 hours and keeps me engaged. Comes out August 30th though, which is only 2 weeks before Borderlands 3 so maybe being kinda short may be good for me, cause I’m dropping any game I’m playing then.

WINNER: Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order

Get cucked Square Enix. Its astonishing how much better this game looks than Marvel’s The Avengers. It is easier when you go for a more cartoony style I’ll admit but that’s not the only reason this title looks better than what we saw Monday evening. There’s so many more characters from the Marvel universe in this title, and the large majority of them are playable. And talk about capitalizing on the hype from Avengers: Endgame by making Thanos, The Black Order, and the quest for the Infinity Stones central to the game’s campaign. And guess what? It’s exclusive to Switch. Huge fucking win for Nintendo.

WINNER: BREATH OF THE WILD SEQUEL

This was the mushroom stamp that ended this years Nintendo Direct. What a baller move. With most of the other presenters waiting until next year (and next gen) to drop bombs, Nintendo just went out and made one of the biggest announcements of the year by sharing that “Breath of the Wild 2” was in production. I would expect something like a Spring 2021 release, but man, way to end the conference with a bang.

The Rest of the Show

The Banjo-Kazooie juke with Duck Hunt was one of the best “gotcha” moments ever in E3’s history. Animal Crossing fans were finally given a trailer and release date for the next entry in their “cartoon life simulator” series. There were a ton of other announcements that were awesome to see including Cadence of Hyrule‘s release date (tomorrow!), a new Fire Emblem, a mafia top-down shooter, and so much more. If it hasn’t been obvious, Nintendo not only won their conference, they are the clear winner for best conference at E3 in 2019. And they did it without Mario. That’s a huge fucking deal. About 3 years ago before the Switch released I remember talking to my friends about how Nintendo might finally be dead. Well, here we are in 2019 and I’m choking on my words harder than PuddleOfDeath chokes in Fortnite (OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH).

Nintendo, congratulations. You’re officially the king of E3 2019.